1730

Trying to webcast my CM1121 lectures again. 1131 will be left to next Tuesday unless I should come to NUS again to mug on Sunday which is like dumb. Life’s been boring these days. But oh wells, at least I don’t need to emo anymore. Thought it through and through. No point dragging around in it. Wallowing in self-pit just isn’t Ah mui’s way of life. I’m just so over it. Though I justified my right to get angry, I realized I don’t gain anything from it. Instead, I would have lost more than what I would have still possess. Realized that as you get older, you lost more than you gain and I’m not talking about weight or the lipids in your body, coz that’s just the total opposite. Relationships, or more like friendships in my case.

But I don’t think anything can go back to how it was last year. Though I wished it would. And everyone wished it would. I can’t pretend nothing happened. Let’s just live with it then =D

Its just me and my piano, once again.

♥ Walking on,
my own dusty road

1702

I cannot and don’t understand what the hell is going wrong with me. I’m in no right to be angry am i? (and the fact that it is raining now and I’m listening to Nobuo Uematsu is not exactly helping). I’m supposed to be doing my webcasting now. My lectures left undone, lab report’s due this Friday. But I just have that something buzzing around my head. No one knows what the heck and why the heck I’m like that. I told myself to get over it a trillion times already. I guess I really need time to wash the remains away. i should be yelling vulgarities at the laptop right now, should i? It isn’t really glam that way. But ARGH. I want to freaking hell get out and breathe some fresh air!!! And thanks that the haze has just arrived too. Crap.

People just ignore this post okays? its just out of a fit of imbalnce in emotions, more commonly known as EMO.

♥ Walking on,
my own dusty road

Went Kbox with my ‘Die Gang’ – ‘Si Dang’ sisters plus Shuyi. Today’s her birthday. So here’s wishing FongSY a very happy birthday and welcome to 2 club! I understand that it is very traumatizing to have the first digit changing. Well, a very impactful day the 20th birthday is. Oh man, I’m speaking like Yoda from the Star Wars now.

Kbox was rather bad at shooing people out of the rooms. We and of course all of the others had already booked the rooms for the 6 to 10 slot. But when we got there, we were told that the rooms were still full coz the people in there have not yet evacuated. And my my, we waited for like 45 mins before we could get into any one of the rooms. Some guy apparently raised his voice at the receptionist about being not informed about the reason behind the long wait and why they couldn’t do anything about the people in the rooms. And guess what. the receptionist broke down. Um.. I guess it’s the overpowering stress.

Random info 1 : I think the song 杀手 is damn nice and the MV is the ultimate cool MV though Xing was like saying its super disgusting. But the effect and plot was GOOD.

Random info 2 : me and Miss Sun actually wanted to go for a drink, an alcoholic one after Kbox since the night was still young at Balcony. And to me the night only ends at the last MRT train. And instead of getting that, we ended up with a big gulp in the end. And instead of sitting at some bar, we ended up sitting at some secluded area at Centrepoint. And talked and talked and talked.

Random info 3 : I want a domo-kun tshirt because Selian has a spongebob one. And I want to fight it out with her to be spastic queen. But if none of us win, we can at least be spastic elastic plastic together. Which makes us very happy.

Random info 4 : I can’t upload the pictures now because no 1 : my cam is with my dad, no 2 : my internet went haywire AGAIN.

Random info 5 : I am very puzzled now about whether I should be angry, depressed, worried, relieved or neutral. The reason behind, I won’t tell you. Heh heh. The only thing I can tell you is that I’m a very extremely confused person now.

Random info 6 : My dream in secondary school was to go dating illegally in school uniform after school. Ah and that was never accomplished. Miss Sun says why not change the goal now to go dating legally in clothes in school. But hello, if I don’t accomplish that, then will my next goal be going dating ultra legally in NUDE in public? Oh man, I sure wouldn’t want that luh. Like OMG luh. HAHA.

Random info 7 : I’ve slacked too much already. Back to mugging. Arggh. =(

♥ Walking on,
my own dusty road

Valentine’s Day

Its 0002 now. So I guess we’re officially into valentine’s day already. 20th anniversary of spending my V day with my beloved single ladies. Oh man, sounds so old already. The day’s meaning had never once failed to emphasize the empty spaces around me year after year. But come to think about it now, since I’ve been like that for like 20 years and counting already, I don’t think I would die without the space being filled up. on the other hand, i frankly can’t see myself spending and sharing my life with another person. Perhaps something to do with me being to used to living my life alone. And heck it manx. (GH is trying to persuade me to not blog emo stuff on V day, let’s just see how it goes.)

And I’ve learnt something today! (like I’m supposed to be proud of it) Relationships are like buying a pair of shoes. If you are not fated, then there won’t be your size. You know, I buy shoes by fate. If there isn’t the one you like or the shop not having your size, there’s no point trying desperately to fit into it. (oh man, I think my analogy is perfect luh =D) and there’s no point giving up something else, like a old but comfortable pair of shoes, just to get something that you may quite like but doesn’t fit. The only thing that you have the justifiable right and that no one can stop you is the right to still love that pair of shoes, the design and the colour.

But wells, if I tell you I don’t care about such stuffs anymore, that’s a lie. Coz who doesn’t? its just a matter of getting used to it. Like being stabbed once is damn bloody painful, then the second time isn’t that excruciating anymore, and it goes on. And one day, you know it happens again, but you can’t feel it anymore. That’s the ultimate level.

And why am I writing such stuff? I don’t know. I just feel like it. It’s something that needs to be let out. To put a full stop to. Its Valentines’ Day anyway. Its ‘Val’s’ Day. My day.=D

♥ Walking on,
my own dusty road

Val’s childhood dream was to become a world class pianist.
She naively planned the beginning of her ‘dream career’ as a concert at the piano recital room in Yong Siew Toh Conservatory of Music.
She wanted to tour the world starting with Vienna and meet Maksim and Yiruma.
She didn’t like conventional pianist.
She rather rock pianist and thosewho turned classic into the word ‘cool’.
She dreamt of having a violinist as a good friend or even more than that, to tour around the world with her and to play duets.
Coz she’s so in love with the strings, the violin and the cello but fate was given that she met the piano instead.
She even dreamt of playing a concerto with the orchestra, how imaginative.
She imagined getting all her friends to watch her play on the stage.
That the stage was her stage.

But reality was not as such. And one can only dream. Back to webcasting CM1121 lecture 5. I've still got a long way.

I guess I’m destined to be a chemist instead. Oh wells, at least it rhymes with pianist. =D

♥ Walking on,
my own dusty road

You tell me that you’ve never seen me so high before like until today. That’s because there was no one to high with me besides during lab. You find it weird right? But THAT”S the NORMAL me. Take it or leave it.

-The Spasticity Talk-
I never had a liking for stoning. It sucks man, I NEED HIGH PEOPLE. HIGH PEOPLE OKAYS. ARGGH. Am I the only one that is retarded around here? Does growing up mean less and less being yourself? Does it mean that you can have fun in a spastic way like you had once before? If it is, then I would rather not grow up. I’ll rather stay this way forever. Maturing doesn’t mean forfeiting the retarded and spastic times we all enjoyed once before. I’m just not myself being all stony or serious or prim and proper all the time. And it sucks to be the only one who thinks this way. So yeah, people, get out a bit more, let your retarded side show. There’s no harm being retarded once in a while you know.

So you know see the difference between us? Welcome to my spastic little world. Welcome to the dark side. =D



And you on the other side *points points*, stop making me feel so helpless can? I really feel like slapping you yet can’t bring myself to. >.< bleah.

♥ Walking on,
my own dusty road

I really love this song!!!. Was watching spongebob yesterday and wah laa... This song just came up. Sung by Spongebob and Patrick. I dedicate this song to all my friends out there especially my 3 angels and 6 fairies and also my juniors who are always entertaining me and cheering me up! It's the most retarded spastic touching friendship song i've ever heard. And it can so apply to us! Here goes... <3

Idiot Friends

Who's there for you when you are sad and down? (Me!)
Idiot friends
Who picks you up and slaps you all around?
Idiot friends
Who puts thorns in you so you can save the town?
Idiot friends, idiot friends, idiot friends

Duh duh duh, doo-duh doop do do
Da dee da da do dada da
Dee da da doo-doo-doo, duh-do

(You know SpongeBuck, all we've been a'doing is singing about what I've done for you. Well, what have you done for me?)

Who helps you pick your pants up off the ground?
(Thanks buddy!)
(Curses!)
(Only an idiot friend would do that!)
(Let's bring it home, idiot friend!)
(Okay!)

Who'll let you ride on his coffin?
Who slaps you hard and often?
What do you and me have in common?
We're idiot friends


P.S. i like the 'slap' part. Can't really remember how many times i've slapped and being slapped by my friends so far but i know we always end up laughing like crazy. Hah. =D

♥ Walking on,
my own dusty road