Arggghhh.... dunno how to express what is that feeling now. Pissed or angry or just disappointed? He's back and he forgets my name. What is this? Haven't i been there for like the past year already? Ok, that's small matter. Pilot pen. Think i dunno what u mean ah? 'Better think twice la...'Better partner the one you think you can play with better.' Maybe you were just saying what comes to your mind. But hey, have you ever thought about what others would think? I know i'm not THAT good, ok maybe i'm really lousy but... arggghhh... Haiz. It's totally DEJA VU! I really dun wan the past to repeat itself again. It sucks. It totally sucks. Guess this is just the words in a spur of the moment, so i hope i dun offend anyone. Gosh, sometimes i think too much i suppose.
MAYBE BEING A RETARD MAKES LIFE BETTER,
KNOWING LESS IS BETTER,
MAYBE LIFE WOULD REALLY BE BETTER.
and 'let nature takes it's course'
We'll see how.

♥ Walking on,
my own dusty road

I spent the last night thinking about what me and Yiwen heard on i think thursday lunch in school. We were just like sitting in front of you guys and you people can even treat us like we're invisible? I can understand that you guys are a clique and wanna have dinner somewhere... I do too with my own clique, but... Ok, firstly we were 'invited' to sit with 'our class', but yet we were left alone to eat in SILENCE. Don't you know how uncomfortable is that? No one bothered about us. We make it a point to try to know you guys better and 'bond', but hey, tell me, how many of you reciprocate that? I know we all seem to come from different worlds, speaking entirely different ' languages', but PLEASE feel a bit more for people like me (People that don't exist in your plans, your life). If you guys think that there isn't a teeny-weeniest bit of common topic, let us be on our own. There isn't a need to invite us to join in when you have never intended to include us in whatever you are planning to talk about and to do! Think of it, you are with a bunch of people and they start whispering into each others' ears. Your first reaction is ' why am i out of the conversation and so why am i standing here in the first place?' You try to ask them and they reply: ' Oh, nothing' or they just ignore you. Something inside you bursts. Alienation. What on earth feels worst than being 'left out'? So dear friends, lessen the pain of others if you plan to get on with life without their existence.
[The above are all of my own mind. Sorry to anyone who may feel that my words are harsh or whatsoever. ]
I have really had enough.

♥ Walking on,
my own dusty road

Guess age is really catching up with me... Seems that it is an issue to me since i see 14 to 16 year olds like everyday {you know, there's IPs in NJ}. I sound like an 80 year old. Haha. But really, time flies real fast. Frankly speaking, i have lots of stuff that i haven't done and regret not attempting. Ok, maybe i had attempted but i just can't cross the mental barrier. You know, like confessing some things. Always wonder why some have the courage to. Ain't they afraid of the outcome? The day is coming when i'll make a wish AGAIN and really really hope it'll come through, but after so many years of doing the same thing with the same content, i don't hope so much already.

♥ Walking on,
my own dusty road